This is going to be a bit of a rant. Also, knowing me, it may or may not be long......it probably will because I like to talk. I came across this blog post this morning http://sailorsotherhalf.blogspot.com/2011/03/military-wives-please-read.html which just got me......annoyed. This isn't the first time I've come across this sort of an attitude towards this infamous list. Please don't get me wrong. I am a firm believer that everyone should be able to have their own opinions about whatever they want.
However: when those opinions involve calling out and bashing others, I tend to roll my eyes a little bit. Everyone deals with deployment differently, and from what I can gather, the writer of this blog has yet to experience a deployment with her sailor. Deployment is hard. There really is no other way to describe it. Yes there are different coping skills you can learn. Yes you can survive, thrive, and become an incredibly independent and even more amazing person than you already were.
You can also find lists like one Things You Never Say to a Military Spouse that can help articulate what it is that you feel when you get bombarded with question after question about your SO's deployment. I know from my experiences everyone I know wants to talk about deployment, and for the most part, I like to pretend it's not existing right now. I have been asked many of the questions on that list, because I'm from SF, and this is in no way a military town. I answer them all with a smile, a polite response, and I keep the snark to a minimum. Why? Because I know they mean well. I also sometimes give them a "you dumbass" look whenever they ask me a question that they should know just by watching the news.
I'm not usually one to blog about something that I've seen on someone else's blog. However, for me, the thought that someone is out there bashing a post that she has no idea what the author was thinking or feeling at the time......it kind of makes my blood boil. A lot of things that are written in jest don't come out that way in print. This could be one of those times, and instead of taking it that way, this person has written a rant post about how horrible and elitist this wife is.
The last thing I'm going to say is please please please think before you speak. Please try and look at it from someone else's point of view. Please realize that not everything blogged about is to be taken seriously. And please realize that this has been circulating around facebook for quite some time now.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
One Hundred
Today makes my hundredth post! Whoo hoo! Who would have thought that something I made on a whim a little over a year ago would have kept my attention for this long??? Yay me :) Oh and for my followers who aren't following Mandy over at My Sometimes Crazy Life should, and not just because she let me Guest Blog for her! Another yay for me! Wow, today is just full of yays!!! I love yays! Not to mention I love the new followers I've gotten from the lovely lovely Mandy. Welcome to the craziness!
Now that I have some new followers, I'm thinking I should introduce myself.
Hi there, I'm J. I like reading, baking, and watching tv shows. However, I hate watching tv shows when they air on tv because commercials drive me crazy. Especially nowadays when commercials are like every five minutes. Ok, I'm done ranting about commercials. In case you hadn't noticed, I have a little bit of verbal ADD, who is able to hold 5 conversations at once and love each one.
Let's see what other weird random things I can think about me. There are quite a bit. I'm random and quirky, my fiance Sailorman calls me weird and picky. I prefer to think of myself and unique and amazing, but you know, that's just me. Oh, that's kind of a biggie right there: I have an amazing fiance who is currently deployed, which bites the big one, but I'm slowly dealing. Sailorman is, rather obviously, a Sailor, and a Secret Squirrel. Use your imagination with that one because while my guess is probably going to be better than yours, I don't know what he does for sure. Let's just keep it that way right?
I can't wait for this deployment to be over, because the end of this deployment means that we're finally going to be moving in together! Yay! (look at that, another yay) So living together, then going to the courthouse and getting married. That just sounds so awesome. During this deployment I'm also planning our reception/wedding deal. Not to be confused with our courthouse getting legal deal. Our reception is the whole nine yards complete with me in what is bound to be an itchy cupcake dress. Can you tell I'm really not excited by this? My bestie D on the other hand is just a little too excited by this....she actually made me read like 7 wedding books at Borders yesterday. Feel sorry for me please!
Ok, now I can feel myself babbling like crazy, so I'm gonna end it now. Thanks for reading and following! Now don't forget to comment :)
Now that I have some new followers, I'm thinking I should introduce myself.
Hi there, I'm J. I like reading, baking, and watching tv shows. However, I hate watching tv shows when they air on tv because commercials drive me crazy. Especially nowadays when commercials are like every five minutes. Ok, I'm done ranting about commercials. In case you hadn't noticed, I have a little bit of verbal ADD, who is able to hold 5 conversations at once and love each one.
Let's see what other weird random things I can think about me. There are quite a bit. I'm random and quirky, my fiance Sailorman calls me weird and picky. I prefer to think of myself and unique and amazing, but you know, that's just me. Oh, that's kind of a biggie right there: I have an amazing fiance who is currently deployed, which bites the big one, but I'm slowly dealing. Sailorman is, rather obviously, a Sailor, and a Secret Squirrel. Use your imagination with that one because while my guess is probably going to be better than yours, I don't know what he does for sure. Let's just keep it that way right?
I can't wait for this deployment to be over, because the end of this deployment means that we're finally going to be moving in together! Yay! (look at that, another yay) So living together, then going to the courthouse and getting married. That just sounds so awesome. During this deployment I'm also planning our reception/wedding deal. Not to be confused with our courthouse getting legal deal. Our reception is the whole nine yards complete with me in what is bound to be an itchy cupcake dress. Can you tell I'm really not excited by this? My bestie D on the other hand is just a little too excited by this....she actually made me read like 7 wedding books at Borders yesterday. Feel sorry for me please!
Ok, now I can feel myself babbling like crazy, so I'm gonna end it now. Thanks for reading and following! Now don't forget to comment :)
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Time to Put on the Cheerful Face
So, I know that since Sailorman has deployed I've been.....well, let's just say manic. I do tend to hit the depressed button when I'm stressed. It's pretty much my default when things are getting a bit too hard for my tastes. Now, life isn't feeling so hard. That might be because PMS is over and now it's just searing agony I have to deal with TMI? If so I'm sorry lol. On to funny stuff. Ever since this happened I knew that I wanted to blog about it.
As to why I haven't yet: I was super sad and worried because I hadn't heard from Sailorman, whether or not he made it to his destination alright. (He did just in case you're wondering.) Then I was just sad because well, he had deployed and I wasn't talking to him every night like I have for more or less the last 17 months. Then we had a huge fight, which neither or us was expecting, not to mention we're still learning HOW to fight during deployment. A lot of new stuff happening!
Ok for reals this time, the story! Setting: night before Sailorman is supposed to leave. I've got all my stuff packed because I was planning on sleeping over at a friend's house. (Sailorman's roommate is an absolute douchebag and I hate him. I can now say that with certainty. However, another story for another blogpost. Not to mention it's not funny and I want this to be a funny post.) Sailorman and I have packed all his stuff. All of his underwear is packed, remember this for the future, though I'm sure many of you are getting where this is going. He's due to leave at noon, so we can stay up a bit more and just hang out. We decided to get a pizza and rent a movie. So Sailorman put in the order on his phone, we go to 7/11, have browsed the movies and have finally agreed on one. Then we discover: both of us forgot our wallets. Oops.
So we go back the apartment, Sailorman starts freaking out because he doesn't think that he has enough time to drive back and still be there for the pizza guy. Finally I just kind of go "babe, I do know how to drive you know" very reluctantly I'm given the precious keys to the Yukon and off I go, with my purse. I buy us some soda and a king size KitKat even though all Sailorman asked for was the soda. Why? Because Sailorman has this awful habit of stealing my KitKats. Now whenever I'm with him I just buy king size and we both get our fix. I rent the movie Grown Up. If you haven't seen it you totally should! It was awesome, we both laughed really really hard. All in all, it was a pretty perfect last night. We fell asleep in each others arms.
That morning, we woke up around 8ish and Sailorman jumped in the shower. Once he got out and was looking around, he realized he had packed all his boxers. He was just about ready to start digging into his pelican case when I found a fresh pair over by the tv (don't ask, I have no idea why I left a single pair of boxers there) and handed them over. Crisis averted! I jump in the shower, I get pretty because I want him to have a pretty last mental image of me. We leave insanely earlier because for some weird reason he HAS to be 45 mins early to everything. It's weird and I don't like it. Mainly because I'm the one who's stuck really bored and really early to stuff.
We get on base, we're in the parking lot, and we're just talking about the weirdest stuff, making plans, mocking other people's trucks and whatnot. Trying to figure out which car I'm going to be getting probably around this time next year. 11:40 rolls around and Sailorman decided to give the guy who's supposed to give him the ride a call to see where we're supposed to be to transfer all the stuff. The guy picks up, Sailorman says hey man so I'm here, what time do you want to leave? The dude goes "wait, who is this?" Sailorman and I just look at each other then Sailorman says "it's Sailorman, you're supposed to be driving me today." The dude goes "ummm...." then you hear in the background "who is that" Dude: "it's Sailorman, he says he's leaving today but I thought he was leaving tomorrow" Head dude: " Who Sailorman? Nuh uh! He's leaving the day after that!" Very swiftly we hear Dude say "hey man, let me call you back" click. Sailorman and I just looked at each other, speechless. Me slowly shaking my head, finally I say: are you effing serious?!
Sailorman just started laughing and said, well babe, let's just wait until he calls back. Then you can have your freakout. That man knows me pretty well huh? About 5 mins later we get a phone call from Dude. Dude says "hey Sailorman listen, you're not leaving until tomorrow at 11." Sailorman goes, "oh ok well see you then I guess" and we leave the base. While driving, we both start laughing, because really? What else is there to do when something like this happens? We ended up going to Walmart to guy Sailorman some new boxers, ate some left overs, and watched about 3/4 of the sixth Harry Potter movie.
We ended up with two last nights, the second was rather anti-climatic if you ask me. Not to mention later on that night Dude called a second time to say that they were leaving at 7am instead of 11. Ugh. So, I didn't get to shower, or put on makeup. I had my glasses on, and was generally in a grumpy mood due to serious lack of caffeine. We said our goodbyes. They were dry. I drove back to the apartment and called a cab for the airport later on that afternoon. I spent about an hour or so repacking all my stuff and watching tv. I then flew home, and got into a pretty big funk which lasted quite a while now.
Let's hope that it'll be a while before my next one, but what I'm learning about deployment is to expect the unexpected. Don't keep your hopes up for much, and try your best to maintain as much of a positive attitude as you can. Oh, and when none of those work, have a huge fight, clear the air, and have your SO apologize for being a complete jerk, mainly due to being around boys 24/7.
It's a new chapter in both of our lives, our first deployment. I think I'm going to try my best to blog more about it. Until next time!
As to why I haven't yet: I was super sad and worried because I hadn't heard from Sailorman, whether or not he made it to his destination alright. (He did just in case you're wondering.) Then I was just sad because well, he had deployed and I wasn't talking to him every night like I have for more or less the last 17 months. Then we had a huge fight, which neither or us was expecting, not to mention we're still learning HOW to fight during deployment. A lot of new stuff happening!
Ok for reals this time, the story! Setting: night before Sailorman is supposed to leave. I've got all my stuff packed because I was planning on sleeping over at a friend's house. (Sailorman's roommate is an absolute douchebag and I hate him. I can now say that with certainty. However, another story for another blogpost. Not to mention it's not funny and I want this to be a funny post.) Sailorman and I have packed all his stuff. All of his underwear is packed, remember this for the future, though I'm sure many of you are getting where this is going. He's due to leave at noon, so we can stay up a bit more and just hang out. We decided to get a pizza and rent a movie. So Sailorman put in the order on his phone, we go to 7/11, have browsed the movies and have finally agreed on one. Then we discover: both of us forgot our wallets. Oops.
So we go back the apartment, Sailorman starts freaking out because he doesn't think that he has enough time to drive back and still be there for the pizza guy. Finally I just kind of go "babe, I do know how to drive you know" very reluctantly I'm given the precious keys to the Yukon and off I go, with my purse. I buy us some soda and a king size KitKat even though all Sailorman asked for was the soda. Why? Because Sailorman has this awful habit of stealing my KitKats. Now whenever I'm with him I just buy king size and we both get our fix. I rent the movie Grown Up. If you haven't seen it you totally should! It was awesome, we both laughed really really hard. All in all, it was a pretty perfect last night. We fell asleep in each others arms.
That morning, we woke up around 8ish and Sailorman jumped in the shower. Once he got out and was looking around, he realized he had packed all his boxers. He was just about ready to start digging into his pelican case when I found a fresh pair over by the tv (don't ask, I have no idea why I left a single pair of boxers there) and handed them over. Crisis averted! I jump in the shower, I get pretty because I want him to have a pretty last mental image of me. We leave insanely earlier because for some weird reason he HAS to be 45 mins early to everything. It's weird and I don't like it. Mainly because I'm the one who's stuck really bored and really early to stuff.
We get on base, we're in the parking lot, and we're just talking about the weirdest stuff, making plans, mocking other people's trucks and whatnot. Trying to figure out which car I'm going to be getting probably around this time next year. 11:40 rolls around and Sailorman decided to give the guy who's supposed to give him the ride a call to see where we're supposed to be to transfer all the stuff. The guy picks up, Sailorman says hey man so I'm here, what time do you want to leave? The dude goes "wait, who is this?" Sailorman and I just look at each other then Sailorman says "it's Sailorman, you're supposed to be driving me today." The dude goes "ummm...." then you hear in the background "who is that" Dude: "it's Sailorman, he says he's leaving today but I thought he was leaving tomorrow" Head dude: " Who Sailorman? Nuh uh! He's leaving the day after that!" Very swiftly we hear Dude say "hey man, let me call you back" click. Sailorman and I just looked at each other, speechless. Me slowly shaking my head, finally I say: are you effing serious?!
Sailorman just started laughing and said, well babe, let's just wait until he calls back. Then you can have your freakout. That man knows me pretty well huh? About 5 mins later we get a phone call from Dude. Dude says "hey Sailorman listen, you're not leaving until tomorrow at 11." Sailorman goes, "oh ok well see you then I guess" and we leave the base. While driving, we both start laughing, because really? What else is there to do when something like this happens? We ended up going to Walmart to guy Sailorman some new boxers, ate some left overs, and watched about 3/4 of the sixth Harry Potter movie.
We ended up with two last nights, the second was rather anti-climatic if you ask me. Not to mention later on that night Dude called a second time to say that they were leaving at 7am instead of 11. Ugh. So, I didn't get to shower, or put on makeup. I had my glasses on, and was generally in a grumpy mood due to serious lack of caffeine. We said our goodbyes. They were dry. I drove back to the apartment and called a cab for the airport later on that afternoon. I spent about an hour or so repacking all my stuff and watching tv. I then flew home, and got into a pretty big funk which lasted quite a while now.
Let's hope that it'll be a while before my next one, but what I'm learning about deployment is to expect the unexpected. Don't keep your hopes up for much, and try your best to maintain as much of a positive attitude as you can. Oh, and when none of those work, have a huge fight, clear the air, and have your SO apologize for being a complete jerk, mainly due to being around boys 24/7.
It's a new chapter in both of our lives, our first deployment. I think I'm going to try my best to blog more about it. Until next time!
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